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Foreplay

Foreplay

Foreplay is a fundamental part of the whole lovemaking experience. Most men and women experienced in sex will agree that the best sexual encounters should include long and sensual foreplay. A big part of the fun on any trip is the journey to get there – do yourself a favor and don’t miss out on it. A more attentive form of foreplay will bring increased pleasure to both partners, and make any sexual experience more satisfying.

Both partners need a little extra spice to get fully aroused and achieve maximum pleasure. The man may need to prolong foreplay to get an erection and the women will usually need the same to become properly lubricated. Unless you are both just wanting a ‘quickie’, there is no such thing as spending too much time on foreplay. The trick is to start intercourse when both partners are fully aroused and having a hard time (pun intended) controlling their desires from foreplay.

Foreplay includes a range of activities such as undressing, kissing, petting and oral sex; but you can add your own thoughts to the list. Sensitive foreplay is so important to good sex because it will help both partners enjoy sexual intercourse more, and it will especially help women reach orgasm more often. Most woman need prolonged stimulation in order to reach complete arousal, and foreplay will provide them with the required encouragement.

There is no such thing as the definitive way to foreplay; it is not about pressing the ‘right buttons’ in any pre-determined order (unless after trying everything out you find that is what you both like). It is about understanding what makes your partner tick and supplying those things that make the experience exceptionally pleasurable. There are many ways to give your partner extreme pleasure, and it all begins in the brain. Compliment their appearance or other attributes, especially if they have a low confidence level; show them that you care about them and what they enjoy.

Creating the right environment for sexual intercourse is all about paying attention to the details, which is especially important at mature stages in the relationship. For example, make sure the room is warm, the lighting subdued and that the appropriate music is playing. Once the mood is right, take the time to undress each other slowly, because the act of removing your partner’s clothes can be an important part of successful foreplay. Many find that undressing increases the eroticism – stimulating and intensifying the feeling.

During foreplay, go slow; begin by kissing and caressing. A kiss is usually the first physical expression of love and desire, but it is also often forgotten during sexual intercourse. During intercourse, kiss the different parts of your partner’s body, and don’t be restricted solely to the mouth. Many women complain that their partner doesn’t kiss long enough and rushes the movement directly to the genital area. Don’t be shy to experiment on every part of the body (for example, many women enjoy particular kissing and nibbling attention to the neck and shoulders) – and remember to prolong the foreplay with more kissing and caressing.

Another reason foreplay is important is for the learning experience. Foreplay is the perfect time to spend time understanding what your partner likes because without that, you will never understand what they really need to be fully stimulated. Don’t be shy; ask for feedback and also give your own. Both partners gain from good communication during foreplay and lovemaking. If words fail you, either SHOW or GUIDE your partner in the direction you want, and encourage them to do the same.

Remember that only by communication can we understand what is required to improve – and that practice makes perfect!


Courtesy of SexInfo101.com

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Her First Time

Her First Time

Most women are naturally a bit afraid of their first time having sex. Will I enjoy it? Will it hurt? Will I satisfy my man? Is he the right one? These are all questions that most women think about before their first time. The truth is that your first few times having sex will not be remembered as your best sex ever. Most women agree that the first time often hurts a little, is uncomfortable, and is often very clumsy. Once you get passed the first few times, you will start enjoying all the pleasures that this type of intimacy has to offer.

Being Ready

The first thing to consider is the person you are with. You want your first time to be with someone you really care for and that really cares for you in return. Since sex will most likely be not that great the first few times, the person you are with is what you’ll want to remember. Many women often rush into sex before they are ready because their friends are doing it or because their boyfriend is expecting it. Neither of these should be a part of your reason, there is no correct amount of time to wait; you just want to make sure that you will not regret the decision later.

A few questions you can ask yourself are: Do I trust my partner with my life? Can I see myself having a long relationship with this person? Is he pressuring me? Is having sex for me, or for someone else?

Although everyone has anxieties, if you don’t feel you are completely ready, wait. If the guy you are with really cares for you enough, he will understand that this is a big decision, and you don’t want to rush it. You do not want to give it up to a guy who is worried more about his stature with his friends then your feelings.

Tips

  1. Choose a place where you feel safe and comfortable, your bedroom may be the best place.
  2. Choose a secure time when roommates / parents / friends won’t come barging in.
  3. Gain some experience ahead of time. You want to have explored foreplay for quite awhile before you take the plunge. Having a good understanding of how your and his body works as well as having played together will take away much of the tension. Make sure that you feel 100% comfortable in the nude with the lights on, as having sex will be much more intimate then looking at each other.
  4. Communication is the most important thing in a sexual relationship. Make sure to talk about doing it ahead of time to make sure that you are both thinking the same thing. Getting the topic out in the open allows you to become more comfortable with the topic.
  5. Most women feel pain during intercourse the first few times because they aren’t used to having an object penetrating them. This can be reduced dramatically through fingering. Whether you finger yourself or your partner fingers you, stretching out your vaginal opening will definitely improve the experience.
  6. Feel free to say stop when ever you want, whether you haven’t started, are starting, or are well under way. It may be because you are getting cold feet, or something about the situation feels wrong, the reason can be whatever you want, just make sure the person you are with will honor your wishes.
  7. Excessive dryness of the vagina can be a problem, especially when nervous of the first time experience of intercourse. Although lubricant will not stop all the pain, it will definitely decrease it to some extent. Lubricant is most often recommended, and it can be purchased here.
  8. There are a few positions that are really good for starting out, depending on your concerns. If you want to be in control, then we suggest having your partner lie on his back, and you can straddle him “cow girl style”. If you would rather be on the bottom, the missionary position is probably the best way to start.
  9. If your partner has erection difficulties, or ejaculates prematurely – either of which often happens the first few times – be supportive. This can be one of the most embarrassing things that can happen to a young man, and if not dealt with properly, can result in ongoing problems. If erection problems do happen, try to stimulate him a little, and take some time before you try to put it in again.
  10. The most important thing you need to know is to practice safe sex by using protection. Whether it be to protect you from pregnancy, or to prevent contracting STDs, you want to protect yourself to the fullest extent. Until you have been with your partner to get checked for STDs, and you are on other birth control, there is no excuse for not using protection. Just because there is no excuse not to use them doesn’t mean that guys will do everything they can to get away from them, and be prepared to hear everything from it makes me go limp, to it takes away from the pleasure, to they were sold out. You can buy condoms at most pharmacies, or order them online from our online store.

Remember, this experience should be an extremely special and intimate time for both partners. Good luck, and remember, the best sex happens with people you care greatly about.


Courtesy of SexInfo101.com

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His First Time

His First Time

Most men are naturally a bit afraid of their first time having sexual intercourse. Will I enjoy it? Will I satisfy her? Is she the right one? Will I be able to get it up? These are all questions that many men think about before their first time. The truth is that your first few times having sex may not be remembered as your best sex ever. Most men agree that the first time is often fast and very clumsy.

Being Ready

The first thing to consider is the person you are with. You want your first time to be with someone you really care for and that really cares for you in return. Since sex will most likely be not that great the first few times, the person you are with is what you’ll want to remember. Many men often rush into sex before they are ready because their friends are doing it and they are ashamed of being virgins. This should not be your reason, there is no correct amount of time to wait; you just want to make sure that you will not regret the decision later.

A few questions you can ask yourself are: Do I trust my partner with my life? Can I see myself having a long relationship with this person? Is she or anyone else pressuring me? Is having sex for me, or for someone else?

Although everyone has anxieties, if you don’t feel you are completely ready, wait. If the gal you are with really cares for you enough, she will understand that this is a big decision, and you don’t want to rush it.

Tips

  1. Choose a place where you feel safe and comfortable, your bedroom may be the best place.
  2. Choose a secure time when roommates / parents / friends won’t come barging in.
  3. Gain some experience ahead of time. You want to have explored foreplay for quite awhile before you take the plunge. Having a good understanding of how both your bodies work, as well as having played together, will take away much of the tension. Make sure that you feel 100% comfortable in the nude with the lights on, as having sex will be much more intimate then looking at each other.
  4. Communication is the most important thing in a sexual relationship. Make sure to talk about doing it ahead of time to make sure that you are both thinking the same thing. Getting the topic out in the open allows you to become more comfortable with it.
  5. Feel free to say stop when ever you want, whether you haven’t started, are starting, or are well under way. It may be because you are getting cold feet, or something about the situation feels wrong, the reason can be whatever you want, just make sure the person you are with will respect your wishes.
  6. If you have erection difficulties, or ejaculate prematurely – something that often happens the first few times – stay positive. Don’t stress it, since stressing it will only cause it to happen again and again. Try to relax. If your erection comes back, it does, and if it doesn’t, it doesn’t. You can try later that day, the next day, next week, or whenever you want, so don’t get yourself down. If you have chosen a good partner, she will understand this and try to help you out with some manual or oral stimulation.
  7. Just like men sometimes have erection problems from anxiety, women may have trouble getting wet (known as Excessive Dryness). Be patient and do everything that you would expect her to do if you had the male version of the problem. The problem can be solved to some degree using a water-based lubricant like K-Y Jelly. You can find it and many other lubricants in our online store.
  8. Be sure you are both open enough to talk about the experience afterwards, even if not right away. Whether it was as hot as a Spanish soap opera, or as embarrassing as a skit from American Pie, be sure to talk about it. If you can’t talk afterwards, then you are simply not ready to move to this level. Communication is the key!
  9. The most important thing you need to know is to enjoy safe sex by using protection. Whether it be to protect your partner from pregnancy, or to prevent contracting STDs, you want to protect yourself to the fullest extent. Until you have been with your partner to get checked for STDs, and you are on other birth control, there is no excuse for not using protection. Although condoms may not always be that pleasant, they are much better then contracting something like genital warts. You can buy condoms at most pharmacies, or order them online from our online store.
  10. We shouldn’t have to say this, but we will mention it anyway. Do not go bragging to others about what happened. Sex is something you share with your partner, and there will usually be privacy expectations. It can be a major event in your life, one that you’d love to share with a friend or two, but find out what your partner’s wishes are first, and respect them.

Remember, this experience should be an extremely special and intimate time for both partners. Good luck, and remember that the best sex happens with people you care greatly about.


Courtesy of SexInfo101.com

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Kissing

Kissing

Kissing is a delicate art and must be taken slowly with a new partner. It can be part of foreplay/sex – or simply an incredibly enjoyable act of romance and intimacy in its own right.

A good kisser knows how to pace themselves, has an active imagination, and understands what their partner likes or may not expect, but will enjoy. When kissing, remember the following: never slobber (though moistened lips are fine and helpful), don’t stare and always pay attention with your non-visual senses (touch, hearing, etc.). Also, there is no such thing as ‘too slow’.

If you are unhappy with a kiss then chances are your partner is going to feel the same way. The best thing you can do is relax, and not just in your body, but your face, lips, neck, everywhere. Be relaxed and confident with how you kiss. Let yourself go with the flow of the moment and savour every second of it.

While you are kissing, remember to use your hands, nose, and breath to entice your partner’s senses. Everyone enjoys being touched and caressed while being kissed. Use your hands to gently caress the cheek, the jawbone, the back, arms, and collarbone. A gentle exhalation of air (remember that good mouth hygiene is important), can provide your partner with extremely light, warm feelings on their face, mouth and neck that are quite arousing.

Never “attack” someone when you kiss them, unless they like that sort of thing – and most people don’t. Treat their lips like you would a dangerous creature. Move in slow and prepare for the kiss. Initial contact should be lips only, firm, yet gentle. React to how your partner is kissing. If they speed up, speed up with them. If they slow down, follow suit. Try to synchronize your actions with one another and always pay attention to their body language.

Conclusion

So now you know how to ‘kiss with a difference’, all you need to do is go try it out. Remember, a badly executed kiss is a real turn-off, but a great kiss is memorable and can be totally seductive…


Courtesy of SexInfo101.com

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Safe Sex

Safe Sex

When approaching the topic of safe sex, the typical first response is something along the lines of; “No sex until marriage!” or “If you make love, where a glove”. In a nutshell, those are the core of most discussions on safe sex.

Although many communities have rules about when a person is and is not allowed to have sex, rules have a tendency of making perceived problems worse then they would have been if left alone… so unsurprisingly, they aren’t working that well. Although we can not disagree with the fact that abstinence is likely the only way to avoid unwanted pregnancy and STDs, the social construct created in at least the western world is not in tune with that philosophy.

Rather then dwelling on when the right time is for everybody, we would just like to remind everyone to stay in tune with their own bodies, and to stay true to themselves as much as possible. If the person you are with isn’t willing to wait for you to be ready, then you can fill this part in yourself…

That said, when you are ready to have sex, you will already know that safe sex is a responsibility of all parties involved, and that knowledge and practice, are the best tools to making sex fun, positive and safe. Use a condom, every time, for any reason, and you will be much less likely to have a problem.

Rubber Reminders

Performing safe sex is recommended whenever possible, but we can not stress the importance enough of using it when with a new partner.

  1. Whenever possible, use latex condoms over other materials.
  2. Since no birth control method is bullet proof, a condom is great backup.
  3. Condoms are a great way to keep toys clean for multi-hole penetration.
  4. Using a latex glove for finger penetration prevents cuts from fingernails.
  5. Using dental dams for oral sex can prevent fluid transfer from a cut lip or gum.
  6. ONLY use water-based lubricants with latex as oil based products destroy it.

In one recent U.S. study* about one-half of the sexually experienced teenagers had failed to use a condom the last time they had intercourse. So for all the kids, bumping and grinding and forgetting to wrap it up, this next section is a taste of reality that can be easy to forget about until it happens to you.

Sexually Transmitted Diseases

Well, that was our pitchy intro, hope you got the point. A little “finger wagging” as our mother’s would say, and now comes the stats. These are important, so pay attention. They provide the foundation for answering the too often asked ‘what are the odds that I’ll catch something this time?’ question, and should convince you that this is a serious affair affecting at least 40 million people around the world every year.

AIDS / HIV

We will begin by looking at the AIDS epidemic. In 1997 2.3 million people were estimated to have died worldwide from the disease. Though that number may be coming down in western countries, the number of people contracting the disease is certainly going up. And over the last twenty or so years over half a million people have died in the USA from AIDS, and it still registers as the primary killer of people ages 25-44. What is the most scary part of this epidemic in North America is the fact that the number of HIV (the virus that causes AIDS) positive teenagers doubles every 14 months.

Q: What is driving these seemingly out of control numbers?

A: up to 80% of infected Americans don’t know that they are carrying the virus.

In an attempt to even the playing field I have included a brief description of what HIV/AIDS is and how it is spread. HIV is the virus that causes AIDS and is spread when semen, vaginal fluid or blood passes from an HIV positive person into the bloodstream of another person. To enter the bloodstream, the virus must enter through a break in the skin or tissue in the mouth, vagina or rectum, or, enter the tip of the penis. The virus then breaks down our immune systems that fight off infection and other illnesses. People tend to contract fairly harmless bacterial or viral contagions, which under normal immune operating conditions would simply keep you in bed for a couple of days, but when the immune system doesn’t work even a common cold can be fatal.

The World Health Organization says that in the first five years of the new century, half of all new infections world-wide will occur between the ages 15-19, and the fastest growing infection rates are among young women. This means that this issue is most pressing for our young people. We can no longer afford to not talk about it, or not educate our children about sex and their responsibilities.

Other STD’s

The fact that AIDS and HIV are so dangerous should not reduce our concern over other types of sexually transmitted diseases (STD’s). Left untreated, sexually transmitted diseases can cause infertility, cancer, birth defects and miscarriages – even death. This being said, with the amount of treatments available and easily accessible, Americans still suffer 10 to 50 times more sexually transmitted diseases than people in other developed countries. This highlights the alarming deficit of knowledge within the general population and need for greater dissemination of preventative methods and awareness of the risks.

To further examine this problem in the US and Canada it is astounding that sexually transmitted diseases are diagnosed 12 million times a year in the United States — including 3 million cases among teenagers. In light of massive empirical evidence suggesting that perhaps there may be a problem, the U.S. spends just $1 to prevent sexually transmitted illnesses for every $43 spent treating them. Gonorrhea strikes 150 times per 100,000 Americans, vs. just three times per 100,000 people in Sweden and 18 per 100,000 in Canada.

There is strong evidence that sexually transmitted diseases greatly increase the risk of sexual transmission of HIV, and thus are not something to exclude from any discussion of safe sexual practices.

Click to learn more about other STDs.

What about Oral sex?

Is oral sex safe? Well, yes and no. This is certainly not to say that there are no risks, though unprotected oral sex is generally considered less risky then unprotected vaginal or anal sex. Since the lining of the mouth is less permeable than the lining of the lower orifices, there is a less likely chance of getting a small tear from the activity. That being said, if a cut is already there (e.g. cut during flossing), then it can be equally dangerous.

To minimize your risk while engaging in oral sex follow some suggestions for experimenting with at least new partners:

  • Use condoms or dental dams whenever possible
  • If you decide to roll the dice on the first tip, avoid ejaculating in someone’s mouth
  • If you see something suspicious, put the fantasy on hold until a doctor clears it
  • Floss and brush regularly – but not right before oral sex
  • Above all, get tested and know your status, so that you can help protect others

Remember to take things slow, and that behind every unwanted pregnancy or STD infection, is a person thinking it wouldn’t happen to them.


Courtesy of SexInfo101.com

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Vaginal Intercourse

Vaginal Intercourse

Vaginal intercourse is more commonly known as sex or coitus in Latin. It is the act of inserting the penis into the vagina, and is one of the most pleasurable experiences that two people can share. This article only covers the basics in what you need to know, make sure to visit the rest of the site for more advanced techniques.

First Time

The first time having sexual intercourse, for many people, is never what they expect. It is never as fulfilling or beautiful as fantasized about or seen in media. Your first time can be a very intimate experience if taken slowly, but do not expect it to be the best sex you will ever have. For women, their first couple of times will be painful and the man needs to take extra special care in going slow and listening to her needs. From the other point of view, many men suffer from a performance anxiety their first time as a result of all this pressure to knock her boots off. If this happens, return back to foreplay, do not let it bother or stop you as it is natural. When the time is right, everything will happen, so be supportive of each other.

First time sexual encounters are usually fumbling, learning experiences, where both people are just starting to understand their partners body and how to make that person satisfied sexually. For more detailed information on your first time, make sure to check out the first time for her and first time for him articles.

Movement

Sex is all about trying to stimulate the sensitive areas of the vagina and penis, how you move should depend on your preferences and the position. Some people enjoy slowly rocking together, others enjoy quick shallow strokes, and yet others love nothing more then the sensation of deep penetration. There is no right or wrong way, as long as both people are enjoying the experience.

A common misconception is that thrusting faster means better sex. Although most people enjoy going really hard right before climax, this point must be reached before the approach feels good. You should always try new things, keep mixing it up by varying your speed and the depth as you build towards climax.

Finding the rhythm may take some time, as will getting your abs, legs, arms and back into shape. Though most positions don’t require a great deal of strength, they all require endurance, so strengthening your muscles is a good place to start.

Positions

Please refer to the sex positions sections for ideas and details.


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Safe Oral Sex

Safe Oral Sex

“How safe is oral sex?” This question has been on the tip of many a tongue (pun intended) for at least the last couple of decades. The evidence is that STDs/STIs (STDs) can be spread through oral sex. With STD rates on the rise, we all should be taking measures to ensure we keep ourselves safe and healthy in all aspects of sexual activity.

Safe oral sex is primarily an issue of prevention of STD transmission – not of pregnancy prevention. But just because it does not involve birth control doesn’t mean we can get lazy about it. Safe sex practices are important regardless of the kind of sex. Here we offer some information on STDs that can be, or are suspected to be, transmitted orally -together with some suggestions on how to make Oral Sex safe.

Oral Sex and STDs

HIV / AIDS

Reports vary, but there is significant evidence that HIV cannot easily be transmitted orally. Dr. Jeffrey Klausner specializes in STD transmission and made some interesting findings during his work in the San Francisco area (USA). Dr Klausner holds that HIV is very difficult to transmit orally. After a study performed on 239 gay/bisexual men, 28% of whom knew their partners were HIV positive, not one reported transmission of the virus. From this study Dr. Klausner concluded that HIV is next to impossible to be transmitted orally.

Further research in Spain followed 110 women and 25 men who were all healthy (HIV-negative) and who had HIV-positive partners for 10 years, and not one of them reported transmission. It appears from this research that HIV is not a significant risk with oral sex. It is important to note however that HIV has reportedly been transmitted through anal sexual contact, making oral-anal contact suspect, especially if open sores or lesions are present.

HPV (Human Papilloma Virus)

This infection has been shown to be transmitted orally, as it is highly infectious when active. It will generally form what look like warts on or near the genitals of both sexes. They may be more difficult to identify on women than men because they may appear on the cervix (inside the vagina) of women. They can also develop around the anus, making anal-oral contact questionable. HPV has the potential in some cases to develop into or precede cancer. Although there is little clinical evidence of oral transmission, the warts shed the virus and any form of contact with them should be avoided if possible.

Gonorrhoea

This bacterium often causes pelvic pain and fluid discharge (from the urethra or vagina, for men and women respectively). It is often carried by women without any symptoms at all and, although not common, it has been reported to have been transmitted orally. As yet, research is inconclusive as to how virulent it may actually be orally.

Hepatitis

This group (Hepatitis A, B, and C) are most often transmitted between intravenous drug users, but there is limited evidence that they may be orally transmissible as well. Hep B is the most worrisome, and can cause chronic liver damage and disease. Hep A is more commonly found and is usually not serious, but is more likely transmitted through oral-anal contact rather than oral-penis/vaginal sex.

Syphilis

While most experts agree that there is a risk of transmission of syphilis through oral-genital contact, it is difficult to quantify at this point. Ulcers or chancres are present when the disease is active, so if any open sores are visible around or near the mouth or genitals, once again, even oral sexual contact should be avoided.

Herpes Simplex Virus (HSV)

This group has become more common in recent years relative to other STDs. It is the most likely cause of ulcers in the genital area (small blisters on the penis or vulva). It has occasionally been reported to have been transmitted by oral sex, but is much more commonly transmitted through penis-vagina sexual contact. When open ulcers are present, transmission risk becomes far greater.

Chlamydia

This disease is another without adequate study to conclude its rate of transmission via oral sex. The disease looks different for men and women. To women it can look like pelvic infection or fertility issues, with outside symptoms showing at a minimum or not at all. To men it involves pain and fluid discharge (leaking fluids) from the urethra. Again, there is little evidence thus far of infection by oral sex, but the pathogen has been isolated in the throats of both men and women, so if symptoms appear, it is probably better to avoid all sexual contact until it is looked at by a physician.

Bacterial infections in the gastro-intestinal tract

There is small evidence that various other organisms including Salmonella, Shigella, and Campylobacter have been transmitted by oral to anal contact. While not often serious, these infections can be painful and require the use of heavy antibiotics to clear from the body. While there has been the occasional fatality from Salmonella and Shigella, the vast majority of cases are quickly recovered from. If you suspect a problem, see your physician.

Safety Precautions

So the basic message is that safe sex practices are still important with oral sex, as with penis-vaginal sex. And as you might expect, the precautions are much the same.

The most obvious method of protection is to avoid contact with partners (especially new partners) who have obvious breaks in the skin of their mouth or genitals. Any form of skin opening, wart, chancre, blister, or ulcer in either the mouth or pelvic region is a clear sign that something may be wrong, and that even oral should be avoided until it is looked into.

Furthermore, for both men and women the next best thing is use of a condom (for fellatio) or dental dam (for cunnilingus). Many people agree that a flavored condom makes a better choice, rather than the taste of straight latex rubber. Dental dams are not nearly as available as condoms, but a condom can be modified for the purpose.

Making a dental dam out of a condom is an easy process. Cut the top and bottom off the condom, leaving the middle section intact and looking like a tube. Cut up one side of the tube and you have a cheap, easy dental dam of decent quality (depending on the brand of condom).

For analingus (oral-anal contact) you can also use a dental dam. Especially with this form of oral you need to be extra careful about cleanliness, so gentle cleaning before engaging in sexual activities is recommended. The key is to be very gentle so as to prevent micro tears in the skin.

In the absence of the above mentioned barrier methods, men can avoid ejaculating into their partners’ mouths to help reduce any risk.

Some have suggested that brushing teeth and flossing before oral sex may help; however, this myth is potentially dangerous. The current thought is that although you may have better breath, flossing or brushing can cause tiny fissures in the mouth that may actually increase exposure to viruses.

Further precautions include avoiding deep or aggressive thrusting into the mouth, as this may cause similar tears in the soft tissues of the throat.

Conclusions about oral sexual safety

Although oral sex is arguably (and now also clinically) safer than traditional sexual contact, there are still the inherent health risks associated with close physical sexual contact. The simple fact is that you need to be careful no matter what you do, who you do, and how you do it with them, so take the needed precautions!

You only get one body, so we encourage you to take care of it with proper safe sex practices.


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Female Orgasm

Female Orgasm

Before You Get Started

Some women seem to have an incredibly difficult time reaching orgasm during intercourse; that is if they are able to orgasm at all. The most common reason for this is that they don’t know their own bodies. Society has had this brilliant effect of instilling into our minds from childhood that masturbation is sinful, wrong and dirty. Well, everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion, but all common sense dictates that this couldn’t be farther from the truth.

Thanks to this misconception, many people, especially women, have stopped themselves from learning their bodies, thereby reducing the chances of being able to fully enjoy sex. It is hard for many women to unlearn all that they have been taught, and they often feel that “touching themselves does not bring pleasure”. There is some truth behind that – they are not lying, they do not feel pleasure. However, this is not because there is no pleasure to be felt, just that they have been indirectly taught to not enjoy it. Getting beyond this will take time and patience, so never rush your partner.

If your woman has never had an orgasm (this is often the case if they say, “I think I’ve had one”), you will want to refer to the Female Masturbation Guide to get things started. Learning to please a woman who can’t orgasm on her own is extremely difficult, so we highly suggest that you start with getting her to play with herself, and allow her to learn how her body reacts to different stimulus.

The last note has to do with your approach. Orgasms can’t be forced, and the more pressure you put on her to cum, the less likely it is to happen. Take things slow, learn techniques, experiment with them and find what works. If you start getting frustrated when you aren’t seeing results, it will show, and unfortunately make it even harder. Sex is supposed to be fun and enjoyable – as soon as you make it too serious, it takes away from the pleasure!

About Orgasms

There are two major types of orgasms a women can have – clitoral and G-spot (otherwise known as vaginal orgasms). When masturbating, women usually learn to get themselves off using their clitoris. There is nothing wrong with that, but it leaves the whole world of vaginal orgasms untapped. Many women are unable to climax during intercourse, as they aren’t familiar enough with the stimulation to enjoy it to its fullest extent. While you learn to read your partner’s body signs, it never hurts to ask a question, especially if you are trying new techniques.Coitus, commonly known as vaginal sex, can be one of the clumsiest ways to stimulate a woman, if done without thought. While it does provide an atmosphere that can be highly arousing, emotionally satisfying and erotic, the degree of stimulation to the woman’s clitoral area is nothing compared to masturbation or cunnilingus. One can incorporate manual stimulation to the clitoris during sex, but this is not very necessary if your woman has had vaginal orgasms in the past, and if you know how to hit the g spot correctly. To learn more about positions and the G-spot, please refer to the G-spot article and Sex Positions section. No one wants to involve geometry into sex, but it is wise to know which positions stimulate the G spot the best. In order to help her achieve a vaginal orgasm, you need to make sure you are “hitting” the G-spot with each stroke.

Many men fantasize about the myth of female ejaculation. Well, for starters, its no myth, most women should theoretically be able to have them. The key is G-spot stimulation, but all of this is also well described in the article on Female Ejaculation.

Some Ideas on Getting Her There:

First of, we would like to remind you to relax, and not to make her orgasm the purpose behind the encounter. The more of a goal you make it; the less likely it is that it will happen. Relax and enjoy yourselves, as that is the most important part.

The Grind

During Intercourse, you want to increase the pressure exerted on the woman’s clitoris. This can be accomplished by rotating your hips just like when you are “grinding” on a dance floor. Try to really push against the front of her groin with the area just above the penis. Rocking back and forth or side to side is a really good way of getting started.

Rule of Thumb

With the woman sitting on top, the man should lie flat on his back, pelvic tilted upward, and stomach muscles tightened. You want to arch your hips upwards to improve the quality of “the Grind”; this can be achieved easily by putting a pillow under the man’s bum. He then should put his hand over the woman’s pubic region, and place his thumb on the woman’s clitoris. While the woman is riding her partner, he can simultaneously stimulate her clitoris.

T Position

With the woman lying on her back, the man should lie perpendicularly (i.e., at a right angle to her, thus forming the ‘T’), while straddling the woman’s far leg. Depending on the woman’s flexibility, this can be a great position for deep penetration, while exposing the clitoris for manual stimulation. This double stimulation is very gratifying and can often lead to the big “O” really quickly.

The Maximizer

The woman lies on her back, legs tightly held together. The man lies on top, or stands/kneels, in front. Instead of being directly in line with her, the man should be at a slight diagonal. Both of her legs should be over one shoulder, or on one side, of his body; he should begin penetration. This position is designed to maximize female clitoral stimulation and is easiest to perform with the man standing or kneeling (i.e. the woman should have her legs hanging off a counter, couch or bed).

Using Sex Toys

Sex toys can be used in virtually any sexual position, and thanks to the creative people who design toys, if you can think of a toy, chances are its already made. If you have never used one, you can read our comprehensive section on buying and using Sex Toys. Then visit our online store to find products designed to increase stimulation during intercourse or masturbation.


Courtesy of SexInfo101.com

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Male Ejaculation/Orgasm

Male Ejaculation/Orgasm

The formal definition of male ejaculation is “the release of semen from the penis”. During sexual stimulation, semen collects in the ejaculatory ducts located where the vas deferentia join seminal vesicles within the prostate gland. When stimulation reaches climax, a spinal reflex causes contractions to the muscles within the penis, urethra, and the prostate gland. These contractions propel the semen through the urethra and out of the tip of the penis. Although male ejaculation and orgasm occur simultaneously in most cases, they are not the same process. An orgasm, specifically, is the rhythmic muscular contractions that are a release of accumulated sexual tension and result in an intensely pleasurable sensation.

The rhythmic contractions occur initially at 0.8-second intervals, just as in women, and account for the spurting action of the semen during ejaculation. The intervals between contractions become longer and the intensity of the contractions tapers off after the first three or four contractions. Semen usually takes a few seconds to appear … ejaculatory inevitability (the point at which stopping is impossible) … because of the distance the fluid has to travel. During ejaculation, the sphincter of the urinary bladder is tightly sealed to keep urine from mixing with the semen, as well as making sure that the fluid travels forward, or out.

There are a surprising 20 million sperm/ml of seminal fluid, and average ejaculation consists of 1.5-5ml. Semen contains aboutonia, ascorbic acid, blood-group antigens, calcium, chlorine, cholesterol, choline, citric acid, creatine, deoxyribonucleic acid, fructose, glutathione, hyaluronidase, inositol, lactic acid, magnesium, nitrogen, phosphorus, potassium, purine, pyrimidine, pyruvic acid, sodium, sorbitol, spermidine, spermine, urea, uric acid, vitamin B12, and zinc — but all in very modest quantities. Some of this is designed to nourish the semen enroute, while other ingredients are designed to neutralize the acidic environment of the vagina (which would normally be inhospitable to sperm). In case you are wondering, most of these ingredients are indeed very healthy, and an average ejaculation contains only about 15 calories.

Since orgasms and ejaculation are separate, it is possible to have either without the other.

In situations where ejaculation occurs on its own, there are two main causes. In the first, involuntary ejaculation occurs during sleep, and is known as nocturnal emission (formally) or a wet dream (in slang). The second main cause is known as premature ejaculation (click here for a more complete explanation), which is a sexual condition in which a man consistently feels he has little or no control over the timing of his build up to ejaculation.

Orgasm can occur without ejaculation. Retrograde ejaculation is a condition where the bladder’s sphincter does not close off properly during ejaculation, so semen flows into the bladder. It is commonly found in men who have multiple sclerosis, diabetes, or after some types of prostate surgery. Before you get worried, it can also occur occasionally in men who do not have any serious problems. It is not physically harmful, but it can render the man infertile and he may have a different sensation during ejaculation. This condition is also known as a “dry come” because the man may experience orgasm, but no semen is released from the penis.

There is also a condition known as retarded ejaculation, ejaculatory incompetence, or delayed ejaculation. It is a sexual condition in which a man is unable to ejaculate even though he is highly sexually aroused.


Courtesy of SexInfo101.com

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G Spot Stimulation

G Spot Stimulation

Where is the G-spot?

If your partner is lying on her back, then her Grafenberg Area, commonly known as the G-spot, is located roughly 1.5″ inside her vagina on the upper wall. The most ultimate orgasms come from a woman having her G-spot stimulated. This area inside the vagina typically has a different texture; ridged (not as smooth) as the rest of her vagina, and when aroused feels spongy. A G-spot orgasm is often associated with the mystical legend of female ejaculation and 15-30 minutes of a euphoric sensation where she is in complete bliss… Don’t expect much from her during this time, she is in heaven.

G-spot Technique

With your fingers approximately two to three inches in, move your fingers in even circles all around the inside of the vagina. It generally feels best if you keep consistent, firm pressure along the entire length of the vaginal walls while fingering. You may wish to give a LITTLE extra pressure towards her belly as long as you don’t break the steady rotational rhythm. Stop rotating your fingers and rest your fingertips on the (usually slightly ridged) area of the vagina just behind the pubic bone and exert pressure towards her belly (upwards). This is direct G-spot stimulation, and it usually feels best if the fingers are subtly moving. You can move your fingers in small, slow circles, or point your fingers more sharply and rock them back and forth.

An advanced and very successful technique is a combination of the two. Trace the inside of her vagina with your finger(s), while moving in and out. Make sure that your fingertip always hits the g spot on each rotation. Finding a nice rhythm is critical in this technique, and when you get it right, she’ll be asking you how you learned that!

Stimulating G-spot During Intercourse

This topic is covered in greater detail in the vaginal intercourse article in the Intercourse section, but keep in mind the angle you position yourself during intercourse. Being able to stimulate the G-spot during intercourse will definitely increase the likelihood of your partner reaching orgasm through intercourse.

Sex Toys

These are designed specifically for this area and are a great way to enhance your sexual experiences. They can vibrate, stay hard, and best of all they don’t get tired. There is no better way to learn how to experience vaginal orgasms than by using a vibrator to help you figure out how to pleasure your body better. If there is a way to stimulate it, there is a sex toy to automate the process and to no surprise this holds true when referring to the G-spot.


Courtesy of SexInfo101.com